if i could write a letter to me..

i try not to regret anything in my life. i think that because of what has happened in my past, it has lead to where i am right now. this can be hard, i spend lots of time wishing things were different but you can't change it, all you can do it learn and move on... but if i could tell the younger me a few things i would say:


-never give up. when you don't think it will get better i promise you it does
-first heartbreak will hurt, and i'd love to say it will be the only one you get, but hang in there and mom will always be there when you need to cry
-keep the job at the snack shack at the baseball field. just do it.
-stay true to yourself. don't let anyone talk you into what they think is cool
-don't be so shy. just smile at people and say hi. trust me it will help you out later in life
-get good grades. its not cool to be stupid. it really isn't and it will help you out when you get to college
-fall in love. you're only young once, it will hurt in the end but it will teach you so much
-mom, and dad really do know what they are talking about. LISTEN. 
-stay away from drama. you will enjoy high school so much more if you just stay away
-have fun. be young. enjoy life.

goodbye life.

have you ever needed to just get away? away from worries? from stress? away from.. everything? i was to this point and after a few meltdowns my parents and i decided it would be best for me to go to illinois. and boy was it a great decision.

 i quit my job a conservice and the next day my dad and i loaded into the car and off we went. 23 hours is a long time to be in a car, but it was full of lots of heart to heart talks and fatherly advice that was much needed. i was able to spend a few days just me and my dad. it was a lot of fun to see him in his home town. on tuesday he dropped me off at my grandmas and it was go go go from then. she is such a great lady, but we haven't always been close to each other so this was a good time to get to know her more one on one. it was fun to see cousins i'd never met, eat places i've always heard my parents talk about, and see new places. while i was out there my cousin talked to one of his friends and  found me a job. sounds amazing right? no. it added more stress to my already stressed out life.   

i spent the first week just enjoying everything. then slowly i realized that i had to come back to life and i didn't know if i was really ready for it. i spent lots of night laying awake wondering what to do. and to be honest. i still dont know. i came home last night and once again realized that life was still here waiting for me. i left, but it waited. now its time to figure out where life is going to go from here.

 but one thing i did learn was who was there for me and who wasn't. i always thought i had some pretty good friends. but leaving i learned that i dont. going two weeks without hearing from people i thought were my best friends hurt so bad. it was a wake up call for sure. but my parents were there for me through all of this and it means the world to me. 

lets hope i can figure out what to do, and soon. 

i'll keep you posted. 

welcome.

summer is finally here! flip flops, shorts, tan lines, snow cones, late night walks, i love everything about it. i can't wait to see what adventures this summer!

 every sunday we get to see brinley for a few hours and boy am i an obsessed aunt, i just can't get enough of her. i love the bows, dresses, pink, purple i love it all.

a few weeks ago, kylie asked me if i would help one of her friends out who is a rockstar rep who was making a movie. it was a staged dance party and we had tons of fun.

moving out

i did what i always said i wouldn't. i neglected my blog. but don't you worry i am back :)


i no longer live at home. it has been a weird adjustment. i have always lived with either my mom, or dad. but now im on my very own. i live with my friend kenzie, and two others. living with two strangers has been a little bit difficult. everyone is still a little bit awkward around each other, pretty much everyone just stays in their room and when we do cross paths its a small "hi, how are you". the place is really cute (pictures will come soon). we each have our own room and bathroom which is so nice. there is a kitchen and living room. this is just for the summer but i'm hoping to stay for the school year.

We went dumpster diving for moving boxes. Tayten loved it.

                                             

life lately

this is what my life has consisted of as of late:


                                                     


                                                   

Lady A Concert

Had a blast a 'bearadise'

                                                     

Pinterest addiction

                                                                 

Time with this little man

                                       

love.

Valentines day is a day for you to be completely in love... or if you're me its a day for you to go to the Lady A concert. Trae got the tickets for Christmas and unlike girls he can't go to a concert with just another guy so he gave them to me. It was an amazing concert:) They are so good live. Everyone there was pretty much in love but me&ky had the time of our lives!!

                                                 thompson squared. lady a. darious rucker.

Snow&Sweaty

Who doesn't want to go climb a mountain in the freezing cold, while they are sick with the flu, and stand there for 5 hours? Psh everyone does right? Well I did, and it wasn't as bad as I just made it sound. It was so much fun. There were about 4 couples that went up and we had a blast! To get up to a good spot to watch them come down the half pipe we had to hike up the mountain.. lets just say it was an adventure. We got a pretty good spot to watch them go, but at moments I think we had more fun watching people slide up and down the mountain. Lucky for me my date was awesome and made sure I didn't fall going up or down!:)

me and tanner

                                                                          

                                                                

we had an amazing spot. and tanner was a great photographer. 

                                                           

such a fun date

Right after I got home from the Dew Tour I headed up to USU for Mardi Gras with Kylie. Talk about one extreme to the other. I went from freezing cold to hot and sweaty. Gross right? It was lots of fun though:)